Archive for the 'Life' Category

Fridays with friends….Judi

magikquilter August 15th, 2008

Friday with J

My virtual afternoon tea today is shared with Judi of Cranberry Blossom who is freshly back from her summer holiday and well into her working week. Judi has always been supportive and inspirational as well as in tune with my blogging style. We are from the same generation although that is no reason in blogging necessarily to click…otherwise Kara and Kaylee and the Bombshell and I would not get on as well as we do! Should have bought some scones, sorry Judi….. next time! Did I mention that she is a fabulous cook and is happy to share the recipes as well? Judi’s recent fabulous thrift find would look a treat with the above set of Royal Albert Old Country Roses.

Judi sews and makes wonderful jewellery, her Etsy shop Pink Daisies can be found here.

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Change of Heart by Jodi Picoult

magikquilter August 14th, 2008

Change of Heart by Jodi Picoult

This book by well known author Jodi Picoult was a slightly different take on her usual formulaic novels, although there were some similarities with The Green Mile by Stephen King which distracted me at times. The novel is ultimately about vengeance and redemption and coming after finishing Cage of Stars by Jacqueline Mitchard it was interesting reading, although not interesting enough for me to pull an all nighter.

Her research is impeccable for her novels and I have noticed she usually tries to draw attention to various topical issues, often more than one in the same book. This book dealt with not only the ethics surrounding the death penalty but associated things like restorative justice. Also the foster care system and the associated problems faced by people with learning and speech difficulties. She also covered Judaism and Catholicism and Agnosticism, Gnostic Gospels, faith and healing and miracles and the question of would we recognise the Messiah if He came to Earth now. Although it was never really explained how we would come to accept a Jewish or Christian Messiah who is a murderer.Then we have the heart transplant and the repercussions of living with an organ inside you that came from a murderer….do you think evil thoughts and can we live with such a person’s organ inside us? We even have a female Jewish ACLU lawyer with self esteem issues.

So this is clearly my problem with her books …. I am so distracted when I read her novels because she puts so much into them that I find my mind going off on tangents, and this is not helped by the constant platitudes and predictability of her novels. I did not buy this novel new and that is probably the best way I can describe her work for me. I would not pay full price or even half price for her books but I would get them out of the library as I do like to see what the current topical issue is for her. In fact these books may be in effect a sort of time capsule, we may look to these in twenty years and be amazed at how society has changed, so she may be some kind of genius after all.

I rate it 3/5

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The Library, The Bookgroup and Life

magikquilter August 12th, 2008

Friday Find

Our local library is a great resource, not in the way you might expect it to be either. We started a Wraps with Love charity group there which still meets every month and it is a wonderful place for students and people to while away a few minutes or hours. Yesterday while purchasing the books above from their sale shelf for one dollar each the librarian asked how my son’s science fiction book group was going.

I told him it had folded after almost two years as the tiny amount of people coming regularly was not enough to sustain the amount of work my son put into it. Also for private reasons which I cannot disclose it became too much for him to manage. One of the reasons it was particularly difficult I feel is that so many science fiction readers are men and a large proportion of those men are not skilled socially so it became a chore rather than a pleasure for us in the end. The librarian thought that the amount of time it lasted was quite good and said he felt confident that if Christopher wanted to do it through the library that he would get more people and that he would have the support of the young peoples liaison officer also Chris, which could make all the difference.

I must say that I was concerned when he started the bookgroup that he would be treated inconsiderately by the people there at times…he is young and so many of them are my age….apart from a few incidents though I think it was a positive experience although his opinions he felt were disregarded at times, but never with any malice, more condescension. So I am now pondering whether to encourage him to go through with the library as a site for his bookclub.

You see we were a little taken aback before when he was asked to get a police check before he could run anything there…whereas  I and the other woman who started Wraps with Love did not have to have one…thought that was discriminatory against men and especially young men. He said it was the beard! I see their point with children around but they have a policy of no child under 12 allowed without an adult and the book group would be on Thursday evenings so its unlikely any small children would be there anyway.

I am also concerned at anything that may bring him unnecessary conflict, there is enough in life without going looking for more and as our recent online difficulties showed, some people can be quite malicious when theirs or their friends opinions or actions or authority are questioned. Sometimes I wonder with my son…should I have brought him up with the selfish attitudes which were prevalent throughout his schooling and now rife through so much of society?  Maybe he would have had an easier path but it was never in him…he has always been CJ the Lionheart.…defender of the weak and bullied and defenseless… with that social conscience though comes a  voice which must be heard and as a mother I both fear and am absurdly proud of the consequences of expressing that voice.

Forgive me my ramblings here…merely thinking with my fingers…good job I have Philosophy as a category.

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Siren Song

magikquilter August 6th, 2008

Mermaid Blues.

Mermaid Blues

I made this almost a year ago for a lady who has had a really rough time with two serious health issues. She is a mother of a preteen who loves mermaids and likes them herself so when I heard she was having a 50th birthday I knew I had the perfect thing to make for her. I love to use Laurel Burch panels especially for children or people who are ill as I firmly believe in the power of colour therapy and also the power of the prayer and meditation which goes into the making of these quilts.

I have not spoken to her since she received it as we no longer go to the bookclub which her ex was a part of but am trusting that the quilt is doing its job…last time I heard she was in much better health.

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This Online Life, Part Two

magikquilter August 5th, 2008

Remember when I asked how we could know that what is said online is true and also how do we ever know anyone online? Well its turned around and really hit us in the face over the past few days. Recently my son and I have been involved in a situation online with a blogger he felt he has known well for over a year who left a post which stated that she was upset and her heart was shattered because someone had said something negative or untruthful about her online. She closed comments so that nobody could address her post or even show their concern. Nobody had any idea what was the matter. I left a comment (edited from we to I) on her previous post then we then sent emails asking if she was all right. No reply.

We then went over to the person we thought she might have been referring to and saw the post she was talking about. The young man was discussing how he was coping with the recent loss of his brother to cancer after a four year battle. He mentioned that the girl he had a relationship with online had broken up with him as he could not give her the time she needed. He was not denigrating her at all in fact he said she was wonderful.

I commented on the young man’s heartbreaking post, it was so indicative of his anguish that even though I had never met him before online I simply had to share my sympathy and concern. After a while I emailed another friend whose blog is part of this girls network and expressed how concerned I was. Meantime the OP was still not responding to emails or comments about how she was.

She then put up a post where she said thanks for your concern and links to a Hallmark card saying thanks for your friendship and started recounting the various losses she had suffered in July which included the most extraordinary tale of a little girl that she had lost in July…a virtual obituary. I was in the room when my son read it and I heard his breathing change….he said mum you have to read this …its really bad ..this little girl died. I went over to her blog to read it….scrolled down over the photos and saw where she had put something like….PS she’s not dead…. just seems like it to me.

We both felt sick and extremely offended that after three days she posted something which was so trivial about the anxiety that her readers had felt and then so warped in its perception of the “loss” of a child. We felt it was offensive on so many levels…it trivialised the losses my son has experienced, he lost a friend when he was in school and then there are all the children he has seen over the years who have lost their battles with various diseases….he has had a lot of loss in his life. So we left comments saying how this had made us feel….she had said in one of her previous posts that she welcomed friends telling her when she has said something wrong or when she has upset someone….said a real friend would let her know. Of course few do…her blog is known for its fluff after all. She quickly respnded by saying that she is sorry that her post caused us such deep offense. she also added throughout the post…she did not die lest you get the wrong idea….without saying why she did that.

Then we were attacked by people on her blog…by people who had not even left comments on that post for days…we were the first responders as it were. I then left a few comments trying to explain what we had felt and why we had so responded but to no avail. These mostly young people, although there is one there who is closer to my age have either said nothing to our defense or attacked us. there are two people who told her to lighten up and that they thought the girl had died too …but guess what they have not been so attacked. I tried to talk to her by email and all I got was you are judging me….about the boyfriend. Who incidentally took the post down which upset her…I can see why now…he did not need a posse of her supporters attacking him in his time of grief.

Today she put up a post where she again closed comments after saying how terrible she is feeling and how two of her supposed friends attacked her when she was so heartbroken yaddayaddayadda…so I have come to the conclusion that we have a slightly disturbed individual, who is also a drama queen, who has no perception of her impact on others. She has constantly bemoaned her singledom and the state of her friendships and relationships with her family …well duh is all I have to say.

You may think I am a mean and spiteful person posting this, I am in fact the mother of a wonderful human being who has done nothing but be a friend to this girl…I shudder to call her a woman… who has twisted everything we have said and done even to changing the post without showing where or how she changed it….making us look to future commentors like nasty vindictive people. My son recently had a blogging crisis due to ill health and she is aware of this but in my mind has no concern for anyone but herself…in discussing the little girl who was “gone” she said something like….I made her hug and kiss me in public cause everyone stared at us and I liked it…am not surprised the parents of this child took her away from that kind of manipulation.

Okay so what is really bothering me is how easy it is to be maligned here on the net and how people can reinvent history…we now look like the baddies here …while we were simply trying to help an online friend. Also I hate to be proven right about online relationships…although I know I do have some wonderful relationships but they have been forged through common interests like craft, thriting and pain or loss. I shall be encouraging my son to do the same.

Edited to say that I am a mother and that is something this young lady may have not taken into account…mothers will fight for their children no matter what age so an attack on my son is an attack which I will not hesitate to address

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Two Words, One Mind

magikquilter August 4th, 2008

Calico, jaffa and coffee

Have long admired this meme after seeing it around various blogs over the past year. I would like to do this as a regular post every month or so to see how much, if anything has changed in my attitude to life and also as a representation of what was going on in my life at the time. Todays post comes while dealing with the  repercussions of stating my concern and opinion online recently…yes I got flamed again…..what can I say…. I have a limited amount of patience for people who create drama and in so doing hurt themselves and others.

Thanks to Kaylee an incredibly brave soul and to the many others who have shared this meme.

I am: disappointed at this moment in time

I think: life is very complex

I know: that we see things from our own life experiences

I have:  compassion in my heart

I wish: that people would not attack when one is expressing one’s opinion

I hate: not being heard

I miss: having a garden to sit in and reflect

I fear: nothing

I hear: birds tweeting interspersed with occasional drilling from work in our block

I smell: the coffee I recently drank

I crave: more coffee

I search: for peace

I wonder: at life

I regret: cannot think of anything…everything has brought me to this place in time

I love: fabric!

I ache: do not get me started

I am not: unhappy

I believe: in what is unseen

I dance: in my mind

I sing: also in my mind

I cry: rarely these days… usually only with anger….there have been too many tears in my life so I choose joy

I fight: even more rarely than I cry

I win: and I lose…such is life

I lose: my reading glasses

I never: judge

I always: try to see both sides of things

I confuse: people who are not creative

I listen: to what is not said

I can usually be found: online or with my head in a book

I am scared: of snakes and spiders

I need: food…its past breakfast

I am happy about: my family and our bond …we are three yet we are one

I imagine: a life with no physical pain

I tag: anyone who would like to do this meme

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